I've had a blog before... xanga, ages ago and recently I've been reading other people's blogs and it seemed like a good idea. I'm a guinea pig for a transitions research project thing at the university and for that I have to talk about my feelings/thoughts/experiences/etc. so i thought i might as well have a blog. why? well.. why not? we live in an internet world after all.
My sister just had a baby, i was going to say 'my sister just had a niece' which shows how i think about her baby. Yeah, on Boxing Day so that's exciting. Stressful but exciting. I live down the other end of the house to her so it's less stressful and less all-hours-getting-woken-up for me which is good because sleeping is great. I'm moving out next year in february so the impact of a baby in the house will only happen for two months, then i'm free from any stress that may cause and ready for all the new stresses that come with living away from home and in the city. the 'big city', that is if anything can be called 'big' in New Zealand. Yes, I live in New Zealand, the most isolated western country in the world according to elpais.com. "Wow, that was subtle he just alluded to his ability to speak spanish!" yes, i can speak spanish, not fluently but decently enough to read elpais.com. It's difficult to describe how well i can speak spanish, i mean, if you knew the nz education system it would be easy but in general terms I have finished a high school education in spanish. I can speak spanish in 'familiar situations' although what is familiar for me is just what i've studied in class. I have been to spain once though but that was pretty much just "donde esta McDonalds?" I didn't know much spanish when i went in 2004.
"I didn't know 'much' spanish". I'm kind of picky when it comes to grammar, i should have said "I didn't know a lot of spanish" because it flows more easily. I got told the other day that I argue in semantics [definitions of words etc.] which I probably do. Definitions to me are really important because they can mean different things to different people in different perspectives. For example, the word 'agnostic' to me means undecided about religion/God/beliefs but to others 'agnostic' encompasses my definition as well as 'religion does not play a part in the person's life' which i identify as 'no religion'. I wonder if arguing in semantics is just a way to specify an argument to my advantage because i know a lot about words. That could be true.
Anyway, I used 'agnostic' as an example because i got asked if i was religious, agnostic or atheist the other day. To me, this is a semantic argument. Yes, it does hinge on belief of course but i was given three choices. I choose to identify with none of those. I identify myself as 'no religion' because religion or religious beliefs play no part in my personal life. It certainly plays a part in my life generally, my sister as well as a lot of my friends are religious but for me it has never been a decision I want to make. The reason I do not identify with 'agnostic' is because i see that as being synonomous with 'undecided' [whether or not this is true, for me socially it is true] and i am not undecided about my religious status. I am fully behind my 'no religion'ness. Another person I was talking to identified this as atheist. Atheism is a disbelief in religion and God. I feel i neither believe nor disbelieve so i am not atheist. If you were to ask me specifics like "Do you believe God is the Creator" I would say "not of 'Man', because I believe evolution is fact". Whether this makes me an atheist or not is up for debate, as most faith based issues are. I choose 'no religion' because I feel that for all the good that religion does, sense of belonging community etc., It also creates a lot of division and conflict, not only in New Zealand but also globally. I also do not like the idea that people feel that because they know and understand a 'higher power' they are therefore morally, or otherwise, superior to another human being, who has not 'found the light' so to speak. This idea of elitist [for what else is it?] division is not right in my mind. Now, this is probably true of a very small proportion of religious people, but it does occur. It may seem a silly reason to not like religion but it is very important to me. However, I do not like to place myself as 'atheist' but rather 'no religion' for I would prefer that religion did not play a part in my life, or possibly negatively influence another life. To be honest, I really like religion. I like the fact that it is a massive positive for so many people. I'm all for positives, but it is the negatives that make me lose my faith in a sense of institutional religion. The institution and the sense of 'us' and 'them' is what I find some degree of fault in.
Identifying my belief, or lack thereof, as 'no religion' is the same way people identify their ethnicity on the census. I think it is important that you can be whatever you want to be. For example, in New Zealand we have NZ European, Pakeha, New Zealander, NZ Maori and of course all the other ethnic groupings. The first three i gave as an example are kind of the same thing. In fact, I identify with all four of those groupings but probably most with 'Pakeha', for i have some Maori blood, but am essentially a white New Zealander. Again with self-identification it all just depends on what the individual feels. If they feel they are a Jedi then so be it. Who is justified in correcting their belief? They may not be a Jedi in the Star Wars way, but they are still allowed their opinion. We do have some people who identify themselves as "Jedi" in New Zealand.
I wonder how this blog will turn out. I seem to have a lot of free time and as that research project tells me, my life is changing, so maybe this will be a way to document it.
Happy Holidays!
